Monday, December 28, 2009
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Where the stories of the HorribleSexyDrunk are told. Also features appearences of Levon Gordon and Twix Mecka and many more. Your eyes are warned. Dont read unless you like being sane. If You Don't Like What You See Then Close Your Eyez. READ, WIPE, LICK, LOVE!
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Kittens rule the world.
HSD: I just hit Levon over the head with crowbar and knocked him out. Wait a minute, this is a jelly filled churro. That just shows how weak he is. I hadnt realized that he had been writting down our conversation and i shall have him killed for that. Twix has left to ride a piece of wood. I dug a deep pit in front of his ramp. He wont be back. Now i shall tell you what this page will be about. It will tell the story of my horrid disgraceful life. It shall make you sick and often my your pet bunnies cry while attacking each other in the basement. Every once in a while it will show brief previews of Twix Mecka's story. But it wont be as good as mine because he lives in a futuristic hell-hole filled with over polluted air and AIDs is in the water.
Twix Mecka comes stumbling through the door like Monk A after a long night. He's covered in sweat and is trying to catch his breath.
TM: DUDE!!! cough! cough! I was skating on the half-pipe and decided to go off the ramp for some air. So i start kicking and pushing toward the ramp and a very angry kitty walks in front of my board. I stopped cause i didnt want to injure the awesome kitty. When i stepped off the board and bent to see if it was alright, It jumped up and attacked my face. Then he let out a screech and called his leigon of evil pink eyed kitties. DUDE!!! IT WAS LIKE 600 OF THEM!!! THEY CAME THROUGH LIKE SPARTANS!!!
HorribleSexyDrunk sits there with a menacing grin on his face that Twix doesnt notice because he is so involved with his own story.
TM:Then all the evil, yet cute, kitties attacked me. They jumped me until i fell in a ditch. I was in there for about three hours. HOW DID YOU NOT NOTICE ME BEING GONE DUDE!?!?
HSD: I guess i lost track of time when I, uhhhh, fell asleep.
TM: Oh, ok. but anyway, they kitties kiinda calmed down once we were all mashed in the pit. surprisingly we started to bond in there. I even named them all.
HSD: All 600?
TM: yup! There was twinkle toes, Meat, Mohskini, Butter Balls...
HSD: I get it.
TM: but then after like two hours they got really pissy and started going crazy and just started scratching everything in sight. That included me. About 450 of the kitties were dead by the time i escaped the pit.
HSD: That would explain why your covered in purple blood.
TM: Yea. Im just thanking God that i made it out of that death pit. I wondered how all of that happened in such good sequence. Its as if someone planned it. Dug the pit, injected the kittens with rabies and sent them after me.
HSD: Now which terrible son of a polygamist would do that???
HorribleSexyDrunk pets the kitten in his lap.
Who Am I(About Your Worst Nightmanre)
- Levon Gordon
- My name is Levon Gordon and i'm a writting and insipring author. I enjoy cute, evil mammals and making stories of bizarre happenings. I also like to write stories of the sad truth. I luv the truth even though it hurts so damn bad. Read and Weep.
